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thoughts of an erotic laborer

love myself better than you

This journal may contain adult concepts.

Created on 2007-09-28 04:06:50 (#13913150), last updated 2009-05-15

13 comments received, 36 comments posted

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28 Journal Entries, 9 Tags, 0 Memories, 0 Virtual Gifts, 1 Userpic

Basic Info

Name:	friendfeelsteel
Location:	New York, New York, United States

Bio

These are the slightly fictional accounts of a male erotic laborer. The sexploits described herein are based in the author's short season of hooking, and his (much longer) time consuming erotic labor. He has yet to be both hooker and john at the same time, and perhaps never will.

Anonymous commenting is enabled and encouraged.

Everything written here is copywritten and shouldn't be reproduced without my permission.

Definitions
Why Sex Work?
Books and Resources
Interests, Friends, etc

Definitions:

Betrayal of Intimacy
Cheating
Adultery: A deeply intimate (usually sexual) act done without the implicit or explicit consent of a romantic partner who has an expectation of some form of exclusivity. "Adultery" is an overloaded term with a lot of religious and legal connotation, and I probably won't use the word much.
Erotic Labor: Any kind of professional act of eroticism: acting in porn, stripping, hooking, phone-sex-operating, etc. R. Danielle Egan prefers this phrase to "sex-work" and I agree.
fBDSM: Functional (or fake) BDSM. Any BDSM-like activities performed primarily for money rather than for thier intrinsic enjoyment or intimacy. I felt the need for this term because what some pros do to indulge the kinky whims of their clients isn't true BDSM anymore than a straight guy sucking cock for money is true "love". There's a bit of crossover with some pros who also do or understand BDSM in their personal lives of course, and as always there can be a vast difference between provider and consumer experiences. A consumer may be getting a true BDSM experience from a pro, while the pro may only be doing fBDSM.
Hooking
Hustling: General terms for a live, in-the-flesh act of sex-for-sale between a client and a provider. Could involve fucking, fbdsm, peeing in someone's mouth, or just giving a nude backrub.
John: a masculine given name. cf john.
john: the client of an act of hooking. cf John.
john0 - johnX: guys who've hired me. john0 got me started, even though he wasn't really a paying client. johnX was my last. No, I didn't have some sort of awful experience with johnX, or even a particularly memorable one. I didn't have an epiphany to make me quit the business. I just was offered a stable "real world" job that I could live with, and I was sick of the taste of cock wrapped in money wrapped in latex. Can't say I don't think about going back to it, but so far I haven't.
Sex Work: A tired euphemism for "Erotic Labor". It's what we want our friends to call it (rather than "hooking", "hustling", "sucking cock" etc).
Widget Salesman: A john's occupation, whether it be selling stock or being a schoolteacher.

Why? for Goddess' sake!

Some of what I like about the work (since my journal is mostly venting) is:

being able to work few hours and make sufficient money;
being able to set my own hours and work when I want (I can't deal with morning jobs AT ALL);
feeling rebellious, against society and especially against my parents, towards whom I have very ambivalent feelings;
being able to bring a bit of transient beauty and company into the lives of lonely men.
Hustling brings a lot of things into garish, in-your-face, focus, and I can learn from this if I try hard enough: it exposes the shams of gender, class, and race roles; it provides an antidote to the ever-present message that physical beauty == goodness.
Sometimes it even makes me feel sexy, although nowhere as much or for as long as being with a real lover, or doing a particularly graceful ice-skating move! :)